I Love This Part!

The quotes get more and more remedial as the days go by... but who doesn't wanna make the blog?

"Black people! Black people! We will NOT take the point! It's NOT that serious!"

"I see cool sh*t and I think to myself "If I had a blog, I could post some of the cool sh*t I see."'

"She kinda looks like a snowman!"

"He had Nike boots on." "Of course he did."

Nicky on N.O.R.E.'s rapping style & why he couldn't be as successful as he used to be today:

"That's not like a bar or nothin, nigga. You just said "no" a bunch of times.'"

"What happened to her twin?"

"I haven't heard of her since. I doubt she's real."

Sometimes... when I'm texting... I wanna write a sad face. But that's GAY."

"I don't even feel like being on this EARTH right now."

"I wasn't stumbling! I was walking straight as sh*t! that's just how I party!"

I can post the quotes, but I can never make you understand the level of pure unintentional comedy each quote delivers. Follow me around for a week. You will DiE. Promise*

Poor Babies

In case you haven't realized while perusing the blog, my friends are kinda... special. I wonder if they say these things on purpose to make the blog, or if maybe they have always been retarded and I never noticed before because I didn't have a blog. Either way, they're keeping me alive.

"I'm just a Storm Card looking for a swipe."

"F*ck outta here, Boston! The street is my runway."

"Why'd you peel the crust off your pizza?"

"I just make choices in life."

Huh?

"Yo! I dun really care if it's cooked of not, man... we dun really have standards like that."

"How do you know so much about guns?"

"I'm from Egleston, son!"

"She like, destroyed y'all personalities!"

"I know how to get a Pepsi!"

"Ice cream cake? I love ice cream cake! It's like a big azz... chocolate rock."

"I just got some Cream E45 from Bermuda, so I'm gonna be a black stallion!"

"How are you cocky with no self- esteem?"

"I sound like a man, you don't hear me? I hope you didn't think that was my real voice!"

"You sound like a dryer. Not a dryer, but that sh*t y'all girls be puttin on your head to dry it."

"Naw... I be like... yeah."

"Man. Woman. BOOM!"

You Go, Girl!

Dani has been super duper heavy and profound since coming back from spring break... in Brooklyn. Don't get it twisted, the girl is deep on the regular. I mean, she regularly breaks out into spoken word in casual conversation. I'm just saying. Either she's on something, or she's tryna make the blog. Well, guess what, love?

Dani Says...

"I caught a cold once... because the world was dirty."

And when Nicky & Alan had their ignorant "good hair vs. bad hair b*tches" discussion, Dani swooped in with

"Love knows no texture."

Whew! Told y'all the girl is DEEP. Kory! You gotta come harder, bruh. Dani's comin for that number one spot! But I digress..

"Sounds like he's a whistler."

Teeheehee. That one was just for you & me, love*

Kory Says...

From the first time we met, Kory has not stopped to take a breath! He just rashes and rashes and rashes... and never gets tired.

On being Alan's "son": "Nobody can't father me, son. I'm ODB. Ol' Dirty Bastard. I am the father, son!"

On time- management: "And I try not to go to sleep cuz sleep is bullsh*t!"

I just feel like Kory should've been in the "Stanky Legg" video. Idk why.*

Quick Quotes

Curtis- "I bet you're one of those people that never gets a headache... cuz... you never act like you have a headache."

Alan- "Study high. take the test high. Get high scores."

Dani on her sprinkles- "It's an ice cream party! All are invited! All are invited! Brown, yellow, pink, blue..."

Alan- "I feel like.. nothing else in the world matters.. except for me eating these pancakes."

P.S. I am fully aware of the fact that nobody understands most of these quotes besides me. And I'm okay with that*